Why Men Need Women.
Congrats!
You and I have made it to Thursday.
It’s been a pretty good week on my end—mostly sunny periods with some thick, intermittent slog.
Thanks to all of you who sent feedback over the last month—your ideas, questions, and suggestions have been incredibly helpful. A few people mentioned the 3-2-1 format as a general preference for shorter newsletters, so I thought I’d try it today and make it shorter and more concise over time. Let me know what you think.
Most of the questions I received last week were related to women and relationships—so I distilled them down into the audio below. Take a listen to my answer, and the 3-2-1 will make more sense.
3 Examples
1. Good Will Hunting
One of my favourite Robin Williams movies. Think of Matt Damon’s character, Will. He only begins to change and confront his past after meeting Skylar (Minnie Driver)—who challenges his defenses but doesn’t try to “fix” him.
She awakens something in him—not by saving him, but by revealing the walls he’s built. She’s not the solution; she’s the spark.
2. As Good As It Gets
I think Jack Nicholson and Helen Hunt both won academy awards for this quirky love story. His character Melvin is a brilliant but bitter man—neurotic, obsessive, isolated. He’s emotionally blocked and socially abrasive. But when he meets Carol (Helen Hunt), a single mother and waitress, something begins to shift—not all at once, but moment by moment.
“You make me want to be a better man.”
3. When Harry Met Sally
The women in my life always want to watch this during the Christmas holidays. Harry and Sally (Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan) spend over a decade circling each other, challenging, annoying, and reflecting each other back—until they both grow enough to meet in love.
Sally isn’t just Harry’s romantic partner—she’s his mirror and muse.
She calls out his cynicism, demands emotional depth, and refuses to play games. Through her, Harry learns vulnerability, timing, and emotional presence—not to “win” her, but to become the kind of man who can love.
2 Quotes
In Jungian psychology, the anima is the unconscious feminine within a man—his emotional body, intuition, vulnerability, creativity, and soul.
It’s not about women out there. It’s the forgotten parts in here.
Individuation is Jung’s word for becoming whole—not just functioning or mature, but unified. A man in whom the conscious and unconscious are in dialogue. Integrated.
Jung calls the encounter with the anima “the masterpiece” for a reason; It’s the most difficult and necessary work a man can do. To meet her is to meet himself—for the first time.
The animus is the masculine counterpart in a woman’s psyche: will, reason, clarity, inner authority.
At its worst, it’s a rigid inner critic.
At its best, it becomes the voice that anchors her to truth.
1 Question
Take a moment to reflect on this week’s question:
Who has inspired you to become a better version of yourself?
I would love to hear from you — do you have a question I can answer in under 5min? If your question is selected I will answer it (informally) and post it in the next newsletter.
And if you have ideas for future topics or feedback on the format, I’m all ears.
Talk soon,
– Dr. John
If you’re focused on integration or want to get clearer on who you are, jump in and book a session.
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Men, Meaning + Microdosing #8
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